Pierced in Denver

It was about a year ago, this week, I found myself on an airplane heading to Colorado for an interview. Although I was battling a cold, the flight was smooth and I was mesmerized by the Rocky Mountains!  My interview went well.  I loved the school and I even struck up a great conversation with one of the other three final candidates…the one who would eventually be the individual chosen to be principal! She was great and I have heard she is doing so well for the school!

What did I learn from my adventure in Colorado? Well, I think it was the first time I really knew that Felicity and I would be leaving Florida. And, you know, I was ok with that. But something happened on my way back to Orlando that hurt me deeply. While I waited to board my flight, I sat and listened to an older couple arguing. He was beyond angry with his wife and he was making sure she knew exactly how he felt. “How long have we been married?” “And you still got me a sandwich with mayonnaise?” “How stupid!” Yeah, that’s right, he was ready to disown his wife because she brought him the wrong sandwich. At first I wanted to go over and hit the guy.  Actually, I wanted to walk over and cram the sandwich down his throat. How can he speak to her like that? It’s just a sandwich! I turned around and stared out the window at the Rockies and tears began to come down my face. “No,” I told myself. “If I were to go over and talk with this jerk, I would tell him that he will one day regret that he was angry about a sandwich.” I immediately thought about the many times I had been unnecessarily frustrated or angry with Jaime…for such dumb things! All of that time was wasted arguing about what time we left for something, or not wanting to watch this movie, or have this for dinner, or wanting my way, or just being so selfish and so combative that I would rather argue my point instead of lovingly putting away my sword.  I can’t tell you how many nights I have thought about how much of an imperfect husband I really was. I can’t tell you how painful it is to think about the moments when I calculated my responses and sarcasm so that Jaime would know how angry I really was about something…something that is no longer important and really wasn’t important then.

I do wish our entire marriage had been like our last six months as husband and wife. We overwhelmed one another with genuine love because we stopped looking out for ourselves. It was no longer important who was right or wrong just that we were together. And we prayed. We prayed like we had never prayed before. Our tears were no longer because we had hurt one another with words but because our hearts were crying out to God, asking Him to see us through the storm. To those who are married, hear from this writer’s heart – I would give anything for a “sandwich with mayonnaise from my Jaime.” Of course, I truly would not wish her back from the joy and the perfection of heaven.  But I hope you hear what I am saying. Put your sword away and treasure the gift God has given you. 

There are those who speak rashly, like the piercing of a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

Proverbs 12:18

2 thoughts on “Pierced in Denver

  1. So well written James as many times over 32+ years I have come to that conclusion as she has spent so many nights in a hospital that trivial little things are just that

  2. Joe, your wife is so blessed to have you by her side. God bless!

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